If I’m being honest, I don’t want to talk about this.
I don’t want to expose this part of my life that has led to fights, anger, and unmet expectations.
What am I talking about?
The missing spouse.
For some of us, Sundays mean walking out the door and leaving a crucial part of our family behind: our husbands.
Maybe your husband wants to hunt instead of going to church, or the game is more important. Or maybe, like me, there might be church hurt in the way. Either way, you have probably tried until you are out of breath to talk him into going.
So what do you do when the arguing, guilt, and whatever else doesn’t change his heart?
We pray! We pray and stay consistent.
PRAY
1 Thessalonians 5: 16-17 says, “ Rejoice always, pray without ceasing,"
Focus on being a constant in God’s ear, not your husband's. God might have planned you to be the one to bring your husband to Him, but at least for me, I don’t believe that’s always the case. Our husbands often are inspired more by other men, peers, and the like.
So instead we honor our husbands, we are kind to them, we show them the love of Christ and we never stop praying that God will turn them into the mighty men of God we know they will become. We let God direct the path of turning their hearts while we focus on just showing God to them.
STAY CONSISTENT
1 Corinthians 7: 14 says, “For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband.”
Have you ever come home from a worship encounter just glowing? The Spirit was powerful, the songs were great, and the message just spoke to you.
Your husband will see that!
When we choose not to go to a worship encounter, or let ourselves slip into behavior we know is wrong, he sees that, too.
Now, are we going to be perfect? ABSOLUTELY NOT.
But we can show that too. Grace, asking forgiveness, and humbling ourselves.
We are windows into the love of our Father for our husbands.
I wish I could end this by saying this was a healed story, but it’s not. That being said, I can see how God is moving and I truly believe that my husband will be the leader in Christ that I know he can be.
But for those days when it’s hard to remember for you, and for me, look back at these prayers.
PRAYER 1
God, help my husband. I know your presence in his life needs your guidance and restoration. God, I also know that my nagging and anger are not how he is going to get there. God, forgive me for both the anger and bitterness I have held toward my husband and the mistrust in you that it shows. God, help me lean on your word and promises. Lead him God, and help me know what to say and how to act to play my part in your great design. I thank you, God. In Jesus Name, Amen.
PRAYER 2
God, I’m hurting. This isn't what I expected, and it seems hopeless. I’m lost, God, and I’m so so angry. I’m angry at him. God, I’m angry at you. God step into this. Create change like only you can. Soften hearts, his and mine, and lead us into a relationship that is stronger because of it all. God, I am choosing right now to put my trust in you. Give me peace and joy in this marriage, and heal us both. In Jesus Name, Amen.
PRAYER 3
God, my husband believes but why doesn’t it feel like enough? God, I want him to lead not just believe. I want him to experience the connection that I know you can provide. The day-to-day relationship that radiates your joy and is present in everything we do. God I want him to see your spirit move. Please guide him out of whatever is troubling him. Touch his heart, his grief, his pain, his guilt, and show him your love and what he can have in you. In Jesus Name, Amen.