There may be someone in your life that you look up to and admire. They may have different qualities that you may like. Maybe they just seem to have their life somehow a little more together than yours. You strive to be like them, but something or someone may drag you down.
As we have learned in the previous weeks, Tamar has been through a lot of hardships. Marrying Er, who displeased God so much that God killed him. Yikes! Then being given in marriage to her selfish brother-in-law, Onan (who also angered God and died). According to custom Tamar needed to be given to Shelah once he had grown up. But Judah was hesitant. I mean, I kinda get that maybe he's thinking Tamar is just bad luck, or evil.
Tamar, was upset that she was sent back to live with her father. It was not her fault her husbands had made God angry. So when Tamar learns that:
1. Shelah had grown up
2. Her father-in-law was in town
3. Judah hadn’t sent for her
Tamar becomes a little more DARING and disguises herself as a prostitute. She’s done waiting.
Judah comes to her not knowing she is his 2 time daughter-in-law and wants um...well ya know…some hanky panky. If he had only known it was her he probably would have been worried for his own safety after what happened to two of his sons.
Before they sleep together she wants to know what her payment will be in return. He offers her a goat, but she asks for a pledge in the meantime, something of his that would prove his identity (His staff and seal with the cord). Tamar was risking it all now. She was lying to her father-in-law about who she was, about to have sex with him, and demanding assurances ahead of time!
Once Judah was back home, he sent his servant with payment so that he could get his personal items back. But they could not find the prostitute. In fact, no one knew of a prostitute in that area.
Then Judah received word:
‘“Your daughter-in-law Tamar is guilty of prostitution, and as a result she is now pregnant.”
Judah said, “Bring her out and have her burned to death!”’
(Genesis 38:24)
Tamar was like, hold up a minute! Take a look at these personal belongings I have of my child's father. Do you recognize anything? Hmmmm?
“Judah recognized them and said, “She is more righteous than I, since I wouldn’t give her to my son Shelah.” And he did not sleep with her again.”
(Genesis 38:26)
In the end, Tamar was blessed with twin boys and now she had the protection she needed. In the end, she was given the number of children she had been promised. One child for each of her marriages.
So in this situation no one was fully in the right. All parties took the situation and tried to fix it the only way they knew how: Judah was protecting his remaining son and Tamar just wanted the children she was promised. We all make mistakes like this and yet because of God’s grace through Jesus, we can become God's children. We are not always going to do things right, only Jesus was able to manage that feat.
The person you look up to the most isn't going to do everything right. No matter how "together" they appear. They could be a part of the lineage of Jesus Christ but it doesn't matter in the end because they still mess up. We must look to God to take care of these situations. Lean in on him, and be DARING as you act on HIS commands.
Sheila Dorris is the adoptive mother of three (now) adult children and is now enjoying being an empty nester. Sheila shares co-ownership of Mojo Merchandise, in downtown Sand Springs, with her best friend. Sheila has served and continues to serve in many areas at Church that Matters. Including: House Church, KTM, Access, Guest Services, and on the production team as a Live Stream Host. Sheila is famous for her sermon notes, taken each week as a guide for others on Facebook. This often starts conversations between those who may have questions about church or may just need to hear the sermon. She loves being silly and making people smile. If you see her, stop her and say "Hello".
Photo by Adele Shafiee on Unsplash