It may shock you to know that I did not grow up as a Christian and none of my family were Christians either. I first learned about God at the age of 6. My papa had passed away, and my grandpa tried to explain it to me with a Dick and Jane version of the Ten Commandments. I don't really remember what he said, but I remember this was the first time he had held me on his knee and read to me. So, I knew what he was trying to tell me was important. I still have the book 38 years later.
Around the same time our neighbors kept trying to invite me to church. My parents didn't go but they allowed me to go. There, in Sunday School, I received my first Bible, a little suitcase of verses and MEMORIZED MY FIRST BIBLE VERSE.
“The Lord is my shepherd I shall not want.”
Psalm 23:1
I had no idea what it meant at the time.
Later, as we walked up all the stairs, to go inside the big church. I was overwhelmed and horrified. Something came over me and I could not, WOULD NOT, go inside. I screamed and cried until they took me home. I never went with them again.
A few years later, I tried going to a couple of churches. I would walk down Elm Street or church row. It was always scary to do it all on my own and would occasionally ask my friend or cousin to attend with me. I don’t ever remember connecting. I was just trying to make friends. Even then, I was searching for something, I just didn't know what I was looking for.
As an adult, I tried going with my best friend and her family. I went there for at least a year. I enjoyed the music; I served along with my friends and was involved. Yet, every time I walked through the door I would get asked if I was new... EVERY WEEK! They knew my friends; the pastor’s wife would even see my friend and I at lunch. Stop and talk to her, invite her to lunch and never say a word to me. I felt invisible. I had hard feelings about it. Even Jealous feelings. Why do they not treat me the same? I started dating my future husband and wanted him to go... he didn't like it, so I stopped going to church.
The next event led to something different. I was married and about 30 years old. A friend and co-worker had just started working with us and her mom lost the battle with Cancer. Obviously, she was heartbroken, but I knew she was a Christian. I was curious and afraid of how her life would change. I watched how she reacted through the weeks that followed. I was impressed with how she wasn't devastated at the loss of her mother. How she could be strong, how she wasn't angry with God. She was always inviting me to Bible study. I always had an excuse. We would talk on our lunch breaks and on slow days. I had no idea she was preparing me. I finally gave in. I went to Bible study where it touched me, and it was like the message was directed right at me. I prayed the prayer, I was saved!
There is a lot more that led me to where I am now. I was later a member of that church where I was baptized. My husband and I were asked to lead a Sunday school class! I had no idea how to do that, I had never really been taught all the stories but I learned right along with the kids which made it more exciting!
I was still not fully vested though until I met my best friend who showed me how to be a worker for Jesus, to worship, and not to skip because I wanted to go to the lake or stay in bed. I needed to be ALL IN as Pastor Rusty reminded us by giving us a poker chip. I have changed in so many ways, I know now. The Lord IS MY SHEPHERD, I am NO LONGER A LOST SHEEP. I AM HIS SHEEP.
Sheila Dorris is the adoptive mother of three (now) adult children and is now enjoying being an empty nester. Sheila shares co-ownership of Mojo Merchandise, in downtown Sand Springs, with her best friend. Sheila has served and continues to serve in many areas at Church that Matters. Including: House Church, KTM, Access, Guest Services, and on the production team as a Live Stream Host. Sheila is famous for her sermon notes, taken each week as a guide for others on Facebook. This often starts conversations between those who may have questions about church or may just need to hear the sermon. She loves being silly and making people smile. If you see her, stop her and say "Hello".
Photo by Akira Hojo on Unsplash