On a winter night, 25 years ago, I was snuggled into my warm comforter on the top bunk. I remember looking up at the popcorn ceiling and thinking. “God lives on that half of the ceiling and Satan lives on that half” my arm sweeping through the air marking out the boundaries between the two places. You see,I was still trying to understand the concept of where, physically, God and Satan lived.
Not long after, I asked Jesus to live inside my heart. I’m going to be honest though, I don’t really remember the event. At times, I worry. Does Jesus really live inside my heart? I actually confessed this fear to my Husband when we were dating.
We were heading west down 71st street and I shared my worry.
“Maybe because I can’t pinpoint the exact hour in my mind, I never was truly saved.”
He gave me a look and said, “Well, do you believe that Jesus is the Son of God?”
“Yes.” I replied
“Do you want him to live in your heart?”
“Of course!”
“Then you are saved.” He said with a nod.
Romans 10:9 says,
“If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”
God knows my heart and knows the year, the day, the hour, the minute, the second, the millisecond I became his daughter. Even if I can’t recall for the sure. Does that make me less saved? No, I don’t believe so. Does it make my story different? Yes. It is harder for me to know if my life is different from the time before I was saved to after I was. I hadn’t done that much living yet. But I do know that when I’m not pursuing God in his Word or in my prayers, I feel the difference.
Have you seen a difference in your day to day life when you read the Bible and pray? Have you ever had a moment where you questioned your own salvation? You are not alone. Go to God and have a chat, talk it out. He is always there waiting to grab you up and say, “Welcome home, Daughter”.
Bethany Thomas is the Publicity Coordinator and a contributing writer for Shaken & Stirred. She is a daughter of God, a wife, and a dog mom. When not writing for the blog, you are most likely to find her reading a fantasy novel or crafting at her home in Sapulpa, OK.
Photo by Adrian Infernus on Unsplash